Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
