HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize