i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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