he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
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