I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
