She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
