but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
