Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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