Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
My feet surprised me
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