ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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