i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
