I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
