you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
