do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Randomize
