Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
