You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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