just tell him i said nine months
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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