Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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