I hope mine doesn't look like that
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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