I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
