Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Success! We fucked roommates!
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
