So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize
