Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
