Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
