in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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