I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
