She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
