I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
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