margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
