Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
