I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
