u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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