The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
