dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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