where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
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