Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
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