i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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