Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
