my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
one might say we're banned from that church
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
