Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
