Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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