your room smells of hookers.
And success
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
