Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
