It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I hope mine doesn't look like that
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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