I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
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