Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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