A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Randomize
