Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
