I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
3 2 1 whiskey
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
