Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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